Random Thoughts

Just some random thoughts and happenings...

Joel had surgery on Thursday to stitch his esophagus holes closed and reinforce them with a neck muscle stitched in behind.  Thoughts:

1.  I was planning to come alone, but the visibility was so bad Thurs. morning that Pete drove me in.  What a blessing it is to have two of us with different abilities to contribute.

2.  Pete got to hear Dr. H's explanation of what exactly he did.  Pete's doubts and concerns vanished when he understood the mechanics of it.  How often are our fears a result of misunderstanding?

3.  Thursday night Joel was in a lot of pain, and wanted me to stay until he "went to bed," though unfortunately he hasn't been able to sleep.  Yesterday he started dozing well in the evening, and I was just sitting beside his bed holding his hand.  I didn't feel very useful, so suggested that I would go home and Michelle would be here today.  He said, "I would like you to stay," and asked that I get here at 9 instead of 10.  Now here I sit again, but I am learning that just being here and touching Joel IS "doing something."    A good lesson for our society, with its emphasis on productivity.

4.  A while ago - maybe after that bout of mental overdrive that I blogged about - I received a sense of assurance that this esophagus problem was going to be solved.  Since then, despite the ongoing challenges, I haven't felt that sense of despair or hopelessness; I have been confident that the troubles will end.  After this surgery, I felt and still feel very strongly that this repair is going to hold up and this is the beginning of the end of this particular problem.  I felt the same way about Michelle's situation - I confidently stated more than once, "She WILL NOT get married without our blessing."  I was right about that; we'll see if I am right about this.  Does God occasionally give me "extra" faith for certain things?  If so, is there any way I can do to get more?  Stay tuned...

Shoulder Time

A friend mentioned that their marriage counselor recommended "shoulder time," where the couple just sits next to each other, possibly relaxing or doing something stationary, like knitting or reading.  I suppose this contrasts with "face time," where you are trying to intentionally build the relationship and might have more pressure to perform or accomplish some emotional breakthrough.  Maybe it's helpful because you can just rest together and that builds community.

I haven't watched the Olympics in years, so last night during the opening ceremonies I decided Pete and I should try "shoulder time"; he was agreeable, so we sat on the floor, bracing our backs against the ottoman, and started watching.  The Russian stadium was filled with beauty, light and interesting history, but I couldn't believe how hard it was for me to sit still and just watch.  I popped up during every commercial to clean the kitchen, and then to get everything out of our old media cabinet (just boards on bricks) so I could rearrange them in the new stand.  I don't know if this "shoulder time" would be helpful or not - maybe it would be - but I don't know if I can even do it!  Stay tuned...

Super Bowl Cheer

"A cheerful heart is good medicine."  Prov. 17:22  We saw the truth of this proverb yesterday as Joel rolled into the basement conference room at HCMC and 31 visitors screamed and hollered and cheered - silently!  We didn't want to overwhelm him with noise and commotion, so we pantomimed the welcome we would normally have given.  Soon the party settled into controlled chaos, however, as small groups visited throughout the room and the projector TV system blared the Super Bowl game and ads continuously.  Parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins and friends brought snacks to share and everyone ate their fill (except Joel).  Cole drove 250 miles to get there, but he said it was "worth it all."   Joel sat in his wheelchair for almost 2 1/2 hours; his smiles blessed the whole crowd.  Though his pain increased throughout the evening, he wanted to remain as long as possible.  When he returned to his bed, Daniel and a couple of friends went back with him to finish watching the Denver debacle.   I can only imagine the misery we would have endured had we been watching that game with only our immediate family!

We traveled home last night, figuring that Joel wouldn't need visitors today but would benefit from recuperation time.  When Pete talked to him this afternoon, though, he said he felt fine.  The love shown by everyone, and the enjoyable conversation with people who understand him, more than compensated for the tiring effects of the trip downstairs.  Happiness heals!